Let’s give these men some tips

photo by; Jasmine Wallace Carter

Please,, I am dying here with frustration and pity. These men need how-to-approach-a-woman tips. First of all, how do you approach a lady and say: ” Sasa msupa, umeweza”, and then expect to get her contacts.


First let me say that women are just human beings no matter how ‘hot’ they may look. They are completely capable of having normal conversations; the weather, the pandemic, and so on. So, relax. Take a breath and speak like a normal human being. The days of cramming innumerable pick-up lines are long gone.

So you have finally managed to get the lady’s number. Please don’t call 5 times after the first call went to voice mail. It is disturbing. It also shows how desperate and out of control you are. Trust me no girl wants that.

If you decide to text her, be interesting or at least refrain from shortening words into letters. Or using ‘x’ instead of ‘s’, well unless you are still in your teens and you think its cool.

For me, I get bored fast; very fast. Within ten minutes of texting, I can tell whether your calls go to voice mail and your texts get blue ticked or,, we talk and chat to the wee hours of the morning.

Let’s say you know each other, you have met occasionally and exchanged contacts. You are not dating, just casually getting to know each other. Please don’t say you love her – much less through a message. Not all girls are cheesy, hopeless romantics and believe in love at first sight. At least am not one of those. It is a total turn off. I make a point of knowing at least both your names before I say the four-lettered word.

Please don’t ‘coincidentally’ show up wherever she is hanging out all the time. Its creepy. Its less creepy if you make plans to hang out though.

Giving compliments. It depends on what you want from her. If its friendship, you can go for the generic compliments: “you look good/nice” if its more than friendship, bolder compliments will do the trick: ” I can’t stop drooling”. Of course how you say it matters even more.

Humor. A sense of humour is always appreciated. If you are not a natural, you gotta work on it.

Till I find ‘the one’ who naturally exhibits these tips and some, am going to continue in my expedition of jumping from one fling to the next, guilt free I might add🤗

Of course there are more tips, leave a comment below to add some more to the list😘

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